“portal” from Magistra Veriditas painting, 2013

Dear Friends,

As a child, I was taught to say prayers in the morning to dedicate my day to God.  As a young woman, I joined in Morning Prayers with others in my household.  Then, I’d always had the suspicion that Morning Prayers would feel so much more “alive” if I’d been able to have my coffee BEFORE  the prayers, rather than after!  These days, when my questions about the mystery we call God are more numerous than my certainties, I open my days with my intentions to be open, compassionate, and to live with integrity.  About 20 years ago I wrote these out, and have developed the habit of going over them thoughtfully just after I awaken, before getting out of bed — and even before coffee!  Some of the words have changed over the years as I’ve learned more about life, but they still “hold”, overall.  They do express how I hope to live my life:

“Radically open to Mystery, and trusting myself, I live a conscious, centered, compassionate life based on integrity and respect.  I see deeply into many worlds, and radiate joy and hope.  I make conscious my radical interdependence with all of reality, and where there is suffering or oppression, I re-member, with love, to make justice, and to bear witness with compassion.  I do these each day, including for myself, in every way that I exercise choice and freedom.”

Those of you who are more traditionally religious could ask why I do not ask for assistance from God for these ideals, or why I don’t pray for others here.   I acknowledge that this isn’t by any means an ordinary morning prayer.  I wanted to be able to set my days in a direction that would be authentic for me even on my “worst” mornings, even on days when any “faith” feels non-existent.  I also want to set my intention based only on what is in my control.  I still have great compassion for others and want them to be eased in whatever ways are needed, but I want to focus on my “circle of influence” while remembering my “circle of concern”, to use Stephen Covey’s terminology.  In my next post I will unpack each of the lines, as they are almost code words for wider and deeper thoughts.

And how do YOU greet your mornings?

With warmth,

Cat

Dear friends,

It’s been a wild ride painting this most recent painting.  Several times I wondered if I’d ruined her, if I should’ve just left it alone at some previous version.  But I’d paint, then listen, then paint, then listen, and now I’m just so pleased with this final iteration.  She needed to be seen as though through water, sometimes half hidden, only appearing at the edge of consciousness.  I know what’s behind it all, and for me, it gives added meaning.

Here is the process, including some of the paintings I posted last week.

Warmly,

Cat

My finished Holy Woman of the Living Waters:

The Lady of Living Waters, in process

Dear Friends,

Here is how I attempt the process of a painting.  I think there will be several more stages still to come.  This is one of the paintings done alongside videos from my teacher, Shiloh Sophia McCloud.  This year we are following the directions, starting here in the WaterWest.  The painting starts with intention and prayer written in pencil right on the canvas.  The first photo shows the four elements building on top of one another, much as we know them in our daily lives.  The second painting shows you my little painting corner in my study.  I don’t use an easel, usually painting with the canvas flat on the desk.  It’s easier on my arms and hands that way, my legs, too!  Unfortunately, painting flat like that limits the size of canvas I can comfortably use.  This canvas at 24″ by 30″ is just a bit too big for comfort, but there’s also something exciting about painting large. The third photo portrays the circle of the 4 directions, where water is in the west, earth in the north, air in the east, and fire in the south.  Many different cultures’ symbol systems follow this pattern, with some regional differences.  The four directions and four elements are also reflected in our playing cards and the cards that were their ancestors:  the Tarot, coming to us from medieval Europe, but thought to be very ancient in the symbolism.  The four directions are also thought to portray different facets of our human lives:  in the west are our watery emotions;  the north has our body the earth and our physical body as well; the east’s air ideas represent the mind; and the fire of the south is our spark of passion, of life itself.

In the fourth photo I painted over the first layers, providing a watery background for my lady to appear.  And here she comes.  If you look carefully at the last photo, you’ll see the energy I imaginatively “charge” her with, pouring in my own hopes and feelings and prayers.  (Every particle dot a prayer. . . every radiating line a wave of energy. . . )

The wonder is also that while I’m painting, I don’t feel the physical discomfort that is my usual experience of life.  Some might say that it’s just a wonderful form of distraction, but I tend to think that there’s more going on than that.  I suggest that it has to do with deep relaxation coupled with alternating between the artistic/symbolic and verbal/rational parts of the brain as I become immersed in the painting and the meaning that I’m projecting into it.   And, though not as physical as a hike or a workout, painting is a physical, tactile experience of beauty and pleasure (at least until you discover the 4-inch blob of paint that fell, who knows when, onto the carpet!)

I wish two things deeply:  that every person finds and explores her or his own expression of beauty and pleasure, and, that I can finagle my schedule so that I myself can paint and write more often!

With loving swirls of teal and cobalt blue,

Cat